Size doesn't matter.

Well, that is something I have been told.  

Not sure if I believe it or not.

Check out this whopper which weighed in at exactly 100 grams.

Now, I know you are all wanting to know

whether it lived up to expectations.

Well, you are asking the wrong person.

However, being the voyeur I am, I can tell you

what I overheard and saw.

There were oooohs and aaahs of pleasure from the kitchen

as the comely cook's tiny hands fondled the giant. 

Her face was slightly flushed...radiant,

her mouth partly open as she hefted the big fella...

weighing, considering, contemplating.

There was a momentary flicker of fear in her eyes as she

comprehended its prodigious girth.

then a smug smile of anticipated pleasure.

Her breathing became shallow

and her pert little bosoms heaved...

up and down, up and down.

Taking the monster in both her hands she beat it gently,

against the edge of the frypan.

She inserted her two thumbs into the crack

and prised it apart with her deft,

and experienced fingers.

As the life-giving contents were released,

somewhat prematurely,

the cook threw back her head, 

eyes closed 

and cried out,

"Wash your hands, dinner will be ready soon."

Yep!  It was a double yolker...so twice the fun!

Who needs fifty shades of grey anyway,

when you can have so many shades of eggshell?